


Family Therapy

by literati42



Category: Batgirl (Comics), Batman (Comics), Harley Quinn (Comics), Nightwing (Comics), Red Hood and the Outlaws (Comics), Red Robin (Comics)
Genre: Fluff, Gen, Humor, Light Angst, Silly
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-06
Updated: 2017-08-06
Packaged: 2018-12-11 17:22:53
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,363
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11718996
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/literati42/pseuds/literati42
Summary: Batfamily week prompt 2: Shenanigans. Tension in the Batfamily is at an all-time high, and one of the Rogues Gallery can’t take it anymore. Time for a little surprise therapy!





	Family Therapy

**Author's Note:**

> Originally posted on tumblr as a part of Batfam Week 2017 for the prompt of "Shenanigans"

            Coming into consciousness felt like slamming through a wall for Red Robin. He blinked and tried to take in all his surroundings at once. The dimly lighting revealed a personality-less room, somewhere underground, he sensed. He tried to shift only to find his limbs unwilling. Scratch that. Unable. He looked down and saw he was bound, hands and feet, to a chair, with wires coiled around the ropes. Wires? He tried to follow them to the source, and his eyes widened. He was very much not alone.

            Batman, Nightwing, Red Hood, the current Robin, Orphan, and Spoiler were tied to their own hooked up chairs. As Tim watched, each slowly began to come around. He tried his restraints again.

            “Ah ah ah,” said a familiar voice. Suddenly the white face of Gotham Siren, Harley Quinn came into his line of vision. He noted at once that she looked weird. Weird for her. Her hair was pulled into a ponytail, and she was wearing a sensible sweater. “Don’t try your usual brand of banter, Batboys and girls,” she said, lifting up a remote, “Because I’ve rigged each of you up. If one of you misbehaves, it will shock the others.” She looked around at the angry eyes of her now silent captives and grinned. “Truth is,” she said, “I have had enough. As a citizen of Gotham and a mental health professional, I am simply appalled by what I’ve seen.” She toyed with the remote, winding it around in her hand. “Every member of this fine city, especially us baddies have heard it. You are a family,” she said, “But you repress your feelings until it comes out when you’re supposed to be catching us!” Harley crossed her arms, “So I am not here as a baddie babe today, sugars.” She sat down on a chair, crossing her legs. “Welcome to family therapy.” She smiled, “You can all talk now and if you work out your problems…” she tilted her head, “I’ll let you go.” She pointed her finger. “Begin.”

            Finally free to talk, Nightwing leaned forward, “I don’t know what you hope to accomplish, Harley, but we’re fine.”

            The Red Hood huffed beside him. They all could feel the eye-roll even if they could not see it.

            “Would you care to begin, Hood?” Harley asked.

            “We’re just a well-oiled machine huh? Yep. No issues here,” he replied.

            “Sarcasm is cute, babe, but not helpful,” their forcible therapist replied as she turned.

            “Some of us prefer humor to feeling repression,” Red Hood said.

            “I don’t see why you insist on calling this _family_ therapy,” the little Robin cut in from his spot, his hood over his eyes. “I am the only _true_ family member here.”

            “Robin…” Dick said.

            “Fine, Nightwing can stay. But the others…”

            “Here we go again,” Red Robin replied, he slumped in his chair. “Why don’t you kill us Harley Quinn? It will definitely be faster than getting these people to talk. Repress it like real men, that’s the Batfamily motto.”

            “Oh my gosh, sexist and unhealthy,” Spoiler retorted, shifting in her seat. “Do you see what I deal with on the daily, Harley?”

“Don’t you have anything to say?” Dick asked Bruce, as Damian sat forward.

“You will release us, you horrible approximation of a clown, right this instant. If you insist you can keep Hood and Red Robin…”

“She is not keeping anyone,” Dick wished his hand was free so he could rub his temple.

            “She is right,” Orphan said looking at her shoes. “There is too much tension here.” The others fell silent, turning to look at her. She raised her gaze to meet there’s. “Family is family.”

            Harley smiled to herself. With a single proclamation, this little girl changed the whole energy in the room. “Does anyone have a response for our new little bat lady over here?”

            “Orphan,” Tim said, pushing forward in his chair. “We…us brothers, we fight. But you know that doesn’t change how we feel about you right?”

            “Yeah, we’re idiots,” Jason said. He looked over at Red Robin. “And it’s not like we all fight. Right?” Red Robin met his brother’s eye and nodded.

            Dick turned, “What’s happening?”

            “Babybird and I have made up lately,” Jason shrugged.

            “When did this happen?”

            “Ages ago, Nightwing. Some people know how to forgive.”

            “You tried to kill all of us!”

            “In the past…”

            Harley began munching on popcorn.

            “So you’ve been sneaking around meeting with Red Hood without us even knowing?” Dick asked, “What if he’d decided you were better dead, _again_?”

“At least he cares!” Tim suddenly shouted. Again everyone fell silent. “At least he gives two thoughts to how I am and what I care about.”

“Red Robin…” Dick said, leaning forward as much as the binds would allow. “We care about you.”

“Forget it.”

“Closing up,” Harley said, wiping her fingers on her pants, “Is not allowed, sweet little bird. You opened the gates now…tell them how you feel.” She met his eyes. “Betrayed? Abandoned? Like an eternal disappointment?”

“Red…” Spoiler leaned forward. “Is the depression back?”

“What depression?” Dick felt his heart breaking, “Tim?”

“Code names,” Damian hissed.

“Red…”

“All of you are so self-involved,” Jason said, “Batman, you won’t even speak up when we are literally facing a threat of death to open up. Nightwing, so involved in trying to prove something to Batman you can’t see what’s in front of your face. And you, half-pint assassin, you just can’t get over how jealous you are to see the literal disaster occurring in your own _cave_.”

“I see you,” Cass said.

“I know, Orphan,” Tim replied, choked with emotion.

“What is he saying, Red Robin?” Batman finally asked.

When Tim did not speak, Jason jumped in. “I’m talking about the fact that you have a teenager who doesn’t go to school anymore. He doesn’t sleep. He’s skin and bones. You didn’t even know he’d been depressed? Are you kidding?”

“And what about Hood,” Tim said. He needed the attention off him desperately. “He’s doing everything in his power to climb his way back from the abyss he was forced into, and none of you are willing to see past it.”

“So obviously there are a lot of feelings…” Harley began.

“What about my feelings?” Stephanie said. “All I want is to be trained as a Robin too. And all I get is rejection.” She sniffed. “And don’t pretend you aren’t mad too, Nightwing. We all see how desperately you want Batman’s approval.”

“Have I been so bad a father,” Batman said, “That all of you have come to hate me?”

“No!” Damian said, “Don’t you get it? If we didn’t care so much it wouldn't hurt this bad!” He sniffed, “Sorry father.”

Then Orphan wrapped her arms around Batman’s neck. “You are hurting too, I see you too. They just want to know you love them, father.”

“Of course…of course,” Batman said, “I didn’t have to have Robins or…any of you. You’re the family I chose.” He looked down, “Even you Robin. Even though you’re my flesh and blood, I chose you too. I chose all of you, and I would choose all of you over again.”

“Wait…how did the girl get loose?” Harley suddenly broke in. They all looked at Cass, definitely out of her chair and hugging Batman.

“I got loose twenty minutes ago,” she said, “But we needed this talk.”

“Uh oh,” Harley stood up, backing toward the door.

“Run,” Orphan said, “You did a good thing today…Run before I remember the bad you did yesterday.” As Harley fled, Orphan slowly released each person. Each member of her family. She started with Tim. “We will not ignore your pain.” Then Jason, “We will not ignore you.” Then Dick, “You cannot blame yourself for this, okay?” Then Damian, with a slight ruffle of the hair, “I hear you.” Then Stephanie, “You are one of us too, sister.” Finally, she released Batman. She smiled at him. “Tomorrow is a new day.”

Harley wiped her eyes as she walked away. “Not so bad,” she said to her stuffed Beaver, “A good day's work, huh?”

           

           

 


End file.
